The first time I watched Koi…Mil Gaya was around my 10th birthday. I remember it was not one I was looking forward to because my mum was visiting her sister for some reason that I’ve long forgotten (but not forgiven…)
All my friends had already seen the movie and I was the only one left when finally my dad took me and my sisters to watch it. Maybe it’s this association that made me fall in love with the movie. I became obsessed with it. It was a good thing that this was during the dark ages when fan fiction was not a thing, otherwise the world would be a detailed Jaadoo backstory richer.
I memorized all the songs and dialogues (as you do) and even had deep debates internally as to what I would do in a situation like this. Would I report that I have an alien, because that would be a HUGE discovery for the advancement of mankind? Or would I adopt it as a pet and enslave it to get better looking and be generally successful? As you can see, ten-year-old me was very popular.
Just a couple of days ago, I was cruising around Amazon Prime and came across Koi…Mil Gaya and it was like the forces of the universe compelled me to take out three hours from my otherwise busy schedule of sleeping and eating and watch the movie again after 14 years.
And so I did it.
Was I disappointed? Were my childhood delusions broken? Will I report Jaadoo to the authorities for the betterment of mankind or keep it as a personal makeover giver? I still don’t know the answer to the last one, and to be perfectly honest, it kind of worries me.
But speaking of being disappointed: NO. The movie is gold. It has been ‘inspired’ from movies like ‘ET’ and the opening credits are exactly in the style of the Star Wars movies and I agree that there were some glaring issues with the movie, not including the muddled sci-fi, but it’s a pretty entertaining movie.
But I did realize some things that ten-year-old me was too enamoured to notice, so here goes:
1) Nisha needs help.
I get why Rohit was doing all this (hiding the alien and singing songs about enslaving it). His mental age was around 12 and his social circle alternated between other 12-year-olds and some adults with questionable fashion and hairstyle choices who were never nice to him. But Nisha? She was a fully grown adult woman who should have questioned the wisdom of running after an unidentified creature, who could have been a murderous alien, in the forest and then hide him. For all she knew Jaadoo could have been a cannibalistic monster. You can’t blame Rohit for this, he saw the adorable blue bastard and saw a huggable pet. But Nisha?
2) The songs don’t make sense. At all.
Take the loveable Singin’ In The Rain inspired ‘Idhar Chala Main Udhar Chala’ for instance. Now this is when Rohit had been fed bull by his friends about Nisha being his girlfriend because she was being nice to him (typical), so I get why Rohit was singing about slowly falling in love (because that’s totally what that song is about. Even my ten-year-old brain could comprehend that). Why was Nisha singing about being attracted to Rohit when she thought that he was a 12-year-old and she was being nice to him because she felt bad for him? Nisha has raised so many questions over the years.
I would let the song ‘Koi Mil Gaya’ go, because that was supposedly in Rohit’s imagination and since he was convinced by his jackass friends that Nisha also reciprocated his feelings, he was singing about finding love in an unexpected place. Am I being too easy on Rohit? Maybe. That kid was endearing.
3) For a movie about an alien, it didn’t talk about the alien that much.
Aside from a few casually thrown around references to Jaadoo’s life back at home planet, Rohit and co. didn’t really care much about him other than what they could get out of him.
The movie needed less Hrithik Roshan slowly transforming into Hulk and more Jaadoo and his thoughts and intentions. Also I came across this fact on IMDB and things make a little more sense.
4) If I went on an alien planet and the planet’s citizens enslaved me, get me to give them makeovers and rig basketball games AND give me a name like Jaadoo, I would kill myself.
Jaadoo was probably one of the most accomplished alien back home. He had to be. He was chosen for a mission to visit a completely new planet and gather data. He either had to be a brilliant scientist or a badass astronaut/army man (if James Cameron movies are anything to go by). But here he was. Dressed in a sack and made to give a bunch of ungrateful kids the ability to fly and play basketball. How would Jaadoo go back and face his peers?
5) How did Nisha and Rohit get married by the end or soon after the end of the movie?
According to Krrish (Koi…Mil Gaya’s sequel), Rohit had gotten immensely intelligent but physically had reversed back to the Rohit of the pre-Jaadoo era (sans muscles and six-pack), no issue with that. But does that mean that he was still mentally a 12-year-old? And if so, how did he get mentally ready to get married, get a job, have a kid and settle down?
I know I’ve been hating on Nisha a lot throughout this post but her character had been set up to fail. Case in point, her sudden attraction to Rohit once the glasses came off and the muscles came on. She had to know that those were alien-voodoo induced muscles. It didn’t bother her, as long as she had access to those banging guns at all times.
Another thing that bothers me is her complete lack of concern about being objectified by two guys who she didn’t even like (she had started to feel unexplainable feelings for Rohit’s new muscles, but she didn’t have any for Raj). She was made the trophy for whoever won a disgustingly unbalanced basketball game and she was fine with it.
7) Raj, the bully, was a jerk.
No surprises here, just reaffirmation of the fact. He had no problem challenging a guy he knew was mentally challenged and physically less capable (he didn’t know about Jaadoo’s enslavement and subsequent body type makeover) Rohit to a competitive match of basketball game.
8) ‘It’s Magic’ is magical.
I forgot how much I loved the song, but was reminded once again that Hrithik Roshan’s got the vibe that we need.